Sallie Moffitt
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In My Backyard: Spring-Summer 2026
My mother shoved another religious tract from her fundamentalist religion into my hand. I didn’t want it, but honestly, I didn’t think I had a choice. I didn’t know what to do.
One afternoon, I noticed creeping tendrils of St. Augustine grass had wound themselves around the stems of my beloved peonies. I decided to make a boundary, a border, around the perimeter.
Could setting a boundary with my mother help keep the
abusive memories of the past from invading my life, like the boundary around my
flower bed prevented the grass from invading my flowers?
Plant of the season: Azalea
In My Backyard: Spring-Summer 2025
I was walking my German shepherd down the street, when a tan Chihuahua darted off a porch, racing toward us, barking and growling. I quickened my pace, hoping the feisty pup would tire out and return home. Instead, the dog continued after us and wandered into the middle of the road.
I was furious at my neighbor for leaving her dog outside alone to be almost ran over and killed. Can I communicate this to her without starting a fight?
Plant of the season: Hyacinth
In My Backyard: Fall-Winter 2024
I had a pattern of dismissing my anger. When asked if I was mad, I denied it, claiming to be fine. I believed anger was a bad emotion, and I refused to acknowledge feeling it. Although I ignored it, my anger did not go away.
Plant of the season: Osage Orange Tree
In My Backyard: Spring-Summer 2024
My mother had a scrapbook documenting her children’s accomplishments, but not one mention of me in the entire book. Whenever I saw that scrapbook, I felt bad about myself.
Find out how I discovered my worth and value.
Plant of the season: Rock Rose
In My Backyard: Fall-Winter 2023
When my neighbor gave me a sack full of iris rhizomes, I planted them, but they didn’t bloom. I blamed my neighbor, but was it really her fault? Find out how I stopped playing the blame game.
Plant of the season: Crepe Myrtle
In My Backyard: Spring-Summer 2023
For years I trudged through life weighted down with an imaginary sack filled with rocks from my failures, mistakes, imperfections, misunderstandings and shame.
Find out how I emptied it.
Plant of the season: Tulips
In My Backyard: Fall-Winter 2022
When I was a young child, I was raped. The fundamental church I attended blamed survivors for the sexual assault.
One summer I wanted to grow sunflowers in a flower bed beside my home. My overwhelming feelings of guilt and shame made me doubt they would grow. Nevertheless, I decided to try.
Plant of the season: Camellias
In My Backyard: Spring-Summer 2022
The religious tract read: “Value others above yourself. Sacrifice your needs for other people.”
For many years, I did just that. My health declined. I became bitter, resentful, angry and depressed. Read my blog post “Careful watering” to find out how I learned to water my soul.
In My Backyard: Fall-Winter 2021
The summer sun blazed down on the bare branches of the hibiscus. The limbs of the normally robust shrub were empty–not a leaf or bloom to be found. Still I refused to give up. I believed it would spring back to life. It just needed more time.
In the past, I used denial as a coping mechanism to survive difficult circumstances. Was I using it again to ignore the unfortunate fate of my plant? How could I tell?
Read my new blog post to learn how I avoided the trap of denial and faced the truth about the shrub.
Plant of the season: Red Oak Tree
In My Backyard: Spring-Summer 2021
Sometimes I find decision-making to be a nerve-racking process. My blog post “Thorns of Imperfection” helped me learn how to stop trying to be perfect and make better decisions.
Plant of the season: The Rose
In My Backyard: Fall-Winter 2020
Sure, I’m grateful my neighbor has a beautiful yard–at least I am now. When I first saw it, I wasn’t happy for him. I felt that green-eyed monster of jealousy rear its ugly head, and I had to do something. Read my new blog post to learn how I dealt with it. Read my blog post to learn more.
Plant of the season: Pecan Tree
In My Backyard: Spring-Summer 2020
Have you ever been told to let go of a problem? To just get over it? To move on? But you can’t seem to do it and don’t know why it keeps bothering you?
Sometimes what we think is our problem, isn’t our problem at all. We have a deeper issue bothering us. It’s beneath the surface, buried under our emotions, like a thorn festering under our skin. Until we dig it out and remove it, the problem will remain. Read my new blog post “Tangled Roots” to learn more.
Plant of the season: Narcissus Jonquilla
In My Backyard: Winter 2019
Have you ever had a good day spoiled when someone criticizes you, insults you or puts you down? Read my blog post to learn more.
Plant of the season: Winterberry
In My Backyard: Fall 2019
Do you believe in God? As a survivor of child abuse, I am often asked that question. read my blog post to learn my answer.
Plant of the season: American Beautyberry
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